• The Latest
  • Creative Etiquette Solutions
http://www.newportmanners.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/storybook-2-wpcf_335x335.jpg
How to Get Out of A Social Obligation

Dear Didi,

My husband and I look forward to attending an annual black-tie charity dinner dance that raises funds for our favorite non-profit. A couple we're acquainted with, but don't really like, attend every year too. That's the problem. A few months ago the wife asked if we would sit with them, and not knowing how to politely get out of being stuck with them, I told her we would. Even though the tables seat twelve, we would be sitting next to them the whole evening. Not our idea of a fun night out on the town. What we love about the event is meeting new people. The husband dances like a gorilla and lands on my feet and the wife gossips about people we like better than we like her. Well, she called to say she was going to request that we be seated together. How do we get out of spending the evening with them?

-N.E., New York, New York

Dear N.E.,

Color me shocked. You mean you don't want to spend a night with people you said you would sit with? Next time, tell the person that you have to check with either your husband, another friend or  couple, before committing. Then be sure to say, "I'll call you, if we can join your table." Should she be so cheeky as to not get the hint and call you after you've essentially said, "I'll call you, don't call us." say, "Oh, dear, I thought I said I would call you, if we were planning on being seated with you." If she pushes, tell her you're sitting with people who had already organized a table. What about now that you're stuck?  You have three options. Call the event person who organizes the sitting and say you do not want to sit with Mr. and Mrs. So-and-So, and to please not tell them. Professional event organizers deal with such requests more than you could imagine. Second, grin and bare it, but when she asks you about next year, tell her you will let her know, if you need a table. Lastly, be honest and say, "Thanks for calling, but we actually have great fun taking our chances by being seated with people we don't know. That's how we make new friends." Your brutal honesty might sting, but she'll get it.  

~Didi

Read More…
http://www.newportmanners.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/Ashley+Olsen+Dress+Hats+Suede+Dress+Hat+pFTdp6ghddFl1-wpcf_335x335.jpg
Fall Mountain Country Western Wedding

Dear Didi,

We are invited to a very casual western cowboy hat dinner on the groom evening outdoors before the wedding in late October, where it is 50 degrees in the mountains in AZ. What can I wear to be warm enough outside with heaters for cocktails, the ceremony, and reception with dinner and dancing?

-M.Y., AZ

Dear M.Y.,

As you say, it is a casual mountain country dinner the night before the wedding, which makes the dress code about dressing the location and climate in a casual style. It is more about the quality than the dressiness of the outfit. Wear any kind of suede, leather, or animal print article of clothing or boots to the wedding and to the dinner the night before. Make that your statement and add a suede hat.

~Didi

Read More…
http://www.newportmanners.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/get-attachment-1.aspx_3-wpcf_335x335.jpeg
When the Wedding Welcome Dinner Is on Halloween

Dear Didi,

My son is being married on November 1st. The evening prior to the wedding there is a Welcome Dinner for all guests hosted by me and my husband. Because it is Halloween, my son and future daughter-in-law want it to be a costume party. Is it distasteful for my husband and me to dress as bride and groom? I am wearing my original wedding dress from 1983 and my husband ordered a rental tux from the same era.

-Patti, Santa Clarita, CA

Dear Patti,

Wonderful idea! As you said, it is a costume party. Most of the guests at the Welcome Dinner will know the wedding couple, and that you and your husband are not the ones being married the following day.  Run your idea by your son and his fiancée for their approval. Personally, I think it would be a real hoot. You may want to spook it up a bit and go heavy on the makeup, with big teeth and a wig.

~Didi

Read More…
http://nm.origamihosting.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/images-92.jpeg
Barbados Destination Formal Wedding

Dear Didi,

We are invited to a formal destination wedding in Barbados next month. They told us it will not be on the beach, but we're not really sure if it's outdoors or indoors. Does my husband have to wear a Jacket? And will a short-sleeved dress shirt pass? It's hot and humid there and he is balking at long sleeves and a tie. I thought it was weird that the invitation didn't say if it was outdoors or not.

-A.J.

Dear A.J.,

A "formal destination wedding" means at the very least your husband should wear a summer suit or summer blazer or jacket with trousers, a collared-shirt and handsome tie. Out of respect for the bride on her wedding day, men will be wearing jackets and ties. It sounds as though the ceremony is not taking place on the beach, but in a hotel or a private home, where they have a tent with a wooden dance floor. On tropical islands such as Barbados there is an indoor-outdoor lifestyle where tiled and stone terraces with a wooden dance floor are used for dining and dancing. Look at the invitation, if it specifies 'Black Tie' or 'Formal Attire,' your husband should dress accordingly. However, he can wear a white dinner jacket, because you'll be in a tropical climate. It is not exactly a short-sleeved dress shirt, but cooler than a tuxedo jacket. At some point after the dancing begins the groom will take off his jacket, and that's the cue for your husband to take off his jacket and fold his tie into one of the pockets and escort you onto the dance floor.

~Didi

Read More…

more_topics