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Taken from The Water Cooler Diaries: Women Across America Share Their Day at Work by Joni B. Cole and B.K. Rakhra

Her website is NewportManners.com, offering classic solutions to everyday etiquette problems. For every rule, there is a reason—“Even elbows on the table. Families were bigger in the old days, and tables were set with lots of glasses and candles. It was a matter of safety and keeping things tidy.” For relationship issues and how to behave, she grounds her advice in three principals—compassion, consideration, compromise and kindness. “But then there is the issue of being kind, but also honest. And sometimes you can’t be both.”

6:00 a.m. The birds chime in with the alarm clock. After checking my e-mail and making a protein drink, I settle down to read the nine questions that have appeared on my website while I was sleeping. The author of the most interesting one (How do I break into the office clique of women who have lunch together most days?) did not leave her e-mail address, which means she won’t see my answer unless I list it in my site’s archive. I post the most interesting questions under one of four categories: Codes + Conduct; Entertaining; Relationships; and Wedding Etiquette.
Every once in a while I wonder, why am I doing this? Especially after my website was hijacked and I had to get it put back in my name. (My husband said hire a lawyer and get it back. He is my rock.) But there is usually one thank-you note a day that makes me realize the site is useful to people all over the world, such as the one I received this morning, We have shared your response with several people. The feedback is that you are creative and gave solid advice. We appreciate your input.
I just got a personal e-mail from a friend whose husband died several months ago and she wants to know if she should send invitations to his memorial service in May. My many friends are how I got into this business in the first place. They would often come to me for help solving social dilemmas, and have told me I have a gift for this. I was looking for a project I could do at home for the rest of my life, and now this etiquette website has become my own little cottage industry.

7:00 a.m. By now I’ve had a chance to answer personal e-mails and read over the latest questions. I like to think about them when I am chugging away on the elliptical machine. On my way to the gym, an art dealer and I exchange cheerful greetings.

7:30 a.m. My personal trainer of two years meets me at the elliptical machine to be sure that my heart rate is up before we work out for a half hour. The father of three children, he inevitably has concerns, and talking things over is par for the course. It is a kind of therapy that makes both of us feel good. Today we discussed his fourteen-year-old son and why he is failing so many subjects in school. I tell him that when I first started working with my then nine-year-old Little Sister through Big Sisters of Rhode Island, she hated math. Her mother, who is mentally ill, hates math, so it has been a real challenge to teach this child the importance of numbers, and to make math fun. Now at the age of thirteen she gets A pluses. We’re still working on science, and I am determined to make her as curious about this subject as I am, if not more. . . . .

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